The Post-Cult Syndrome.What to expect when exiting a cult?
Posted by foresi.
THE POST CULT SYNDROME, the untold side effects of a cult
Many of us who have exited a cult have felt a terrible time afterward with often conflicting emotions.You may decide to stop joining a cult but as in all things there were elements in that cult that made your mind happy at some time, such as easy friendships or the sense of belonging to a true family.Also the feeling of personal worth generated by the ideals or mission of the group.All these feelings are part of the post cult syndrome.If you know from advance which are those elements that your own mind will put forward as a conflict , you will be better prepared to go through this normal syndrome, which usually takes some time to dissolve depending on how long you were exposed to the controllers´brainwashing.
POST-CULT SYNDROME EFFECTS
* spontaneous crying
* sense of loss
* depression & suicidal thoughts
* fear that not obeying the cult’s wishes will result in God’s wrath or loss of salvation
* alienation from family, friends
* sense of isolation, loneliness due to being surrounded by people who have no basis for understanding cult life
* fear of evil spirits taking over one’s life outside the cult
* scrupulosity, excessive rigidity about rules of minor importance
* panic disproportionate to one’s circumstances
* fear of going insane
* confusion about right and wrong
* sexual conflicts
* unwarranted guilt
* sense of loss
* depression & suicidal thoughts
* fear that not obeying the cult’s wishes will result in God’s wrath or loss of salvation
* alienation from family, friends
* sense of isolation, loneliness due to being surrounded by people who have no basis for understanding cult life
* fear of evil spirits taking over one’s life outside the cult
* scrupulosity, excessive rigidity about rules of minor importance
* panic disproportionate to one’s circumstances
* fear of going insane
* confusion about right and wrong
* sexual conflicts
* unwarranted guilt
When you exit your cult, your will usually feel it as a total abuse.You will also start seeing what actually happened to you and not what they wanted you to believe that was happening.That will result in a traumatic experience like any great change in a person´s life and you should expect passing through stages of adjusting yourself to the new change
* Disbelief/denial: “This can’t be happening. It couldn’t have been that bad.”
* Anger/hostility: “How could they/I be so wrong?” (hate feelings)
* Self-pity/depression: “Why me? I can’t do this.”
* Fear/bargaining: “I don’t know if I can live without my group. Maybe I can still associate with it on a limited basis, if I do what they want.”
* Reassessment: “Maybe I was wrong about the group’s being so wonderful.”
* Accommodation/acceptance: “I can move beyond this experience and choose new directions for my life” or…
* Reinvolvement: “I think I will rejoin the group.”
* Anger/hostility: “How could they/I be so wrong?” (hate feelings)
* Self-pity/depression: “Why me? I can’t do this.”
* Fear/bargaining: “I don’t know if I can live without my group. Maybe I can still associate with it on a limited basis, if I do what they want.”
* Reassessment: “Maybe I was wrong about the group’s being so wonderful.”
* Accommodation/acceptance: “I can move beyond this experience and choose new directions for my life” or…
* Reinvolvement: “I think I will rejoin the group.”
Passing through all these stages is seldom a smooth progression. It is fairly typical to bounce back and forth between different stages. Not everyone achieves the stage of accommodation / acceptance. Some return to cult life because they can not survive without brainwashing even if they know that it is false, but at least they have some sense of belonging to something, no matter what. But for those who do not, the following may be experienced for a period of several months:
* flashbacks to cult life
* simplistic black-white thinking
* sense of unreality
* suggestibility, ie. automatic obedience responses to trigger-terms of the cult’s loaded language or to innocent suggestions
* disassociation (spacing out)
* feeling “out of it”
* “Stockholm Syndrome”: knee-jerk impulses to defend the cult when it is criticized, even if the cult hurt the person
* difficulty concentrating
* incapacity to make decisions
* hostility reactions, either toward anyone who criticizes the cult or toward the cult itself
* mental confusion
* low self-esteem
* dread of running into a current cult-member by mistake
* loss of a sense of how to carry out simple tasks
* dread of being cursed or condemned by the cult
* hang-overs of habitual cult behaviors like chanting
* difficulty managing time
* trouble holding down a job
* simplistic black-white thinking
* sense of unreality
* suggestibility, ie. automatic obedience responses to trigger-terms of the cult’s loaded language or to innocent suggestions
* disassociation (spacing out)
* feeling “out of it”
* “Stockholm Syndrome”: knee-jerk impulses to defend the cult when it is criticized, even if the cult hurt the person
* difficulty concentrating
* incapacity to make decisions
* hostility reactions, either toward anyone who criticizes the cult or toward the cult itself
* mental confusion
* low self-esteem
* dread of running into a current cult-member by mistake
* loss of a sense of how to carry out simple tasks
* dread of being cursed or condemned by the cult
* hang-overs of habitual cult behaviors like chanting
* difficulty managing time
* trouble holding down a job
Most of these symptoms continue as the victim mainstreams into everyday routines of normal life. In a small number of cases, the symptoms continue and you will require some extra professional help.
* This information is a composite list from the following sources: “Coming Out of Cults”, by Margaret Thaler Singer, Psychology Today, Jan. 1979, P. 75; “Destructive Cults, Mind Control and Psychological Coercion”, Positive Action Portland, Oregon, and “Fact Sheet”, Cult Hot-Line and Clinic, New York City.
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